BY NELSON NG
2020 has been a rather exhausting year. Exhausting because, it has been very much out of control. More than ever now, people are worried about what the future holds. As we worry about the coming year — or even just tomorrow — we try very hard to determine what happens. We make plans, then plan Bs, and sometimes, even plan Cs.
But the universe never cooperates. And why should it?
For most of us who live in cities, we’ve forgotten what it feels like to lose control. As we get better and smarter at changing our environment to suit our daily lives, we have come to believe that that the universe revolves around us. We demand instant-gratification, expect excellent results, insist on being on schedule, and take it for granted that everything works at the click of a button. We are used to being in control. We think being in control makes us happy. And the cities that we live in encourage this.
But maybe being in control doesn’t always make us happy.
We are reminded of our vulnerability when we travel. In a foreign place, we have to adjust to new surroundings, adapt to the local food, and learn to communicate using a different language. Things won’t work the same way they do back home, and we realise how helpless we are when we are out of our comfort zone.
It is probably even more so when we travel out of cities into the countryside. Nature can be beautiful, but it can also be unreasonable. It will choose to rain when it wants to, and be scorching hot if it feels like it. The grass might be soft to lie on, but the rocks that lay around can also be sharp and deadly. The breeze can be nice at times, but it can also turn into an uncontrollable wind that blows your hat off. You can try to reason with nature, but it will not reason with you. You have no other choice but to only act according to its will. And in the process you are reminded, that you are not the boss of the world. There is something way more powerful than us at work here.
And this is what I like about travel. It humbles us. And it also liberates us from ourselves. It reminds us that it’s okay to mess up, to let things break down, and to let ourselves be defeated. We don’t always have to be strong and perfect. We don’t always have to know everything. We don’t always have to be holding the reins. It’s okay to just sit back and enjoy the ride. It’s okay to let go.
And so I wrote this little poem in the opening pages of Issue Seven, as a reminder for our readers and also for myself, to surrender ourselves to the journey once in a while. There is strength in learning to be accepting, rather than being insistent all the time. It is especially true in these trying times, when nothing goes according to plan, and everything seems to be falling apart. We might not be able to change the situation, but we can definitely change the way we react to it. There is freedom and happiness in giving up control.
Because it was never ours to begin with.
2020年让大家特别累。累是因为这一整年发生的事情都非常难控制。人们比以往更加担心未来的发展。而在我们担心明年 — 甚至明天 — 的时候，我们就会尽所有能力去控制未来将会发生的事。我们会做很多计划，然后也会做一些备用计划，而且也会为备用计划再准备一些备用计划。
但宇宙永远不配合。它又为什么会呢？
对于大部分生活在城市里的人，我们其实已经忘了失去控制的感觉。随着我们越来越擅长改变环境来适应自己的日常生活，我们也开始相信宇宙围绕着我们旋转。我们要求即时满足，期望获得出色的结果，坚持按时完成，并且觉得只要单击一下按钮，一切正常运作就是理所当然的。我们习惯了掌控。我们相信掌控能让我们幸福。而我们所居住的城市也鼓励这种行为。
但也许掌控并不总能让我们开心。
当我们旅行的时候，就会被提醒自己有多么无奈。在一个陌生的地方，我们需要适应全新的环境、当地的食物，以及用不同的语言来沟通。一切都不会像我们习惯的那样，而当我们走出舒适区时，我们意识到自己有多么无助。
离开城市进入乡下时，情况可能更是如此。大自然可以是美丽的，但也可以是不合理的。它想随时下雨就下，想变得炎热就突然地转变。草地虽软，可以让我们很舒服地躺在上面，但周围的岩石也可能是尖锐而致命的。偶尔的微风也许非常舒适，但它也可能突然变成无法控制的台风，把你的帽子吹走。你可以尝试与大自然讲道理，但大自然不会与你讲道理。你别无选择，只能按照大自然的意愿行事。而这个过程会提醒你：你不是世界的老板。在此地，有比我们更强大的势力。
这就是我喜欢旅行的理由。旅行能使我们感到谦虚，也能让我们从自我的世界解放出来。它提醒我们，可以让安排被捣乱，让事情自然崩溃，也允许自己被打败。我们不必一直坚强而完美，也不需要拥有所有的答案。我们不必一直当驾驶员，偶尔也可以当乘客享受一下旅程。我们可以让自己放手。
于是我在LOST第七期里的前几页写了这首诗，来提醒自己和读者们，偶尔把自己的命运交给旅程。懂得去接受也是一种力量，而不一定要一直执着地坚持。这个想法在这艰难而无法控制的时期尤其如此。我们也许无法改变目前的状况，但我们绝对可以改变自己对状况的反应。放下控制反而会得到自由和幸福。
因为它本来都不属于我们。
NELSON NG 出生成长在新加坡，自从2004年出国到纽约留学后，就一直在世界各地跑。在纽约留学时，他投入了美术与设计，也爱上了印刷品。之后因为工作搬到上海，重新发现旅行，创办了独立杂志《LOST》。目前 NELSON 在上海设立了出版工作室 VOLUME PRESS，一边听爵士音乐，一边幻想出更多有趣的创作。
Nelson Ng was born and raised in Singapore. After graduating from Pratt Institute (Brooklyn, NYC) in 2008 with a BFA in Painting, he fell into the world of advertising and moved to China to work as an Art Director at advertising agency Wieden+Kennedy Shanghai. During his time in Shanghai, he rediscovered travel and founded LOST magazine in 2014 as a platform for people to share their personal travel stories. Since then, he has left advertising to focus on publication projects through the publishing studio VOLUME PRESS.
